My Blog

Baptism

2010-09-24T23:21:00.004-05:00

I am going to be baptized Sunday morning.

This summer I took a mandatory class for grad school at CCU called History of the Restoration Movement. While I do not agree with everything the Restoration Movement teaches regarding baptism, the class did open my eyes to the importance of baptism and the fact that it really isn't "optional" for Christians. It is a Biblical command. So when my pastor announced that there would be a baptism service this Sunday, I felt that now, at the tender age of 31, I should make a public confession of my faith.

I have to admit I am nervous, very nervous. I feel vulnerable about the whole thing and I am not sure why. If I had my way, I would prefer for Steve and I to go to a private place (creek, river, or pond), we could pray together and he could baptize me. Some how that doesn't seem to be the historically accurate way for this type of thing to done, so Sunday morning, in front of a bunch of people I don't know very well, I am going to "take the plunge".

I am quite sure that no-one is going to see a dove or hear a voice from Heaven when my wet head comes up out of the water, but I hope that God is pleased just the same.

The Power of Scent

2010-06-18T10:22:00.011-05:00

This morning I was walking to work and along the way passed a mimosa tree growing over the neighbor’s back yard fence. Inhaling the strong heavy scent of the hot pink blossoms, it was suddenly summertime in Salisbury, North Carolina on a dusty country road, and I was six years old playing make-believe under a magical tree with beautiful fronds and delicate blooms. It was so real and the memories so vivid.

The smell of food, coffee, flowers, perfume, pines, air after it rains - connectors that tie us to our past are endless. I wonder what the Apostle Paul had experienced that inspired him to use a scent metaphor when writing, “But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing.”

2010-03-14T14:20:00.005-05:00

I am a legalist, or to make the truth a little more palatable, I have a legalistic mind-set. This afternoon it hit me so clearly. Steve and I gave up refined sugar and artificial sweetener for lent. Instead of focusing on the death of Christ and the beauty of His sacrifice, all I can think about is how much I can’t wait for Easter to come so I can eat the incredible chocolate dessert my mom is making, how much I miss my diet drinks, and ashamedly I wonder how much weight I will loose by not eating junk food. But I think what is even more disturbing than my distorted views on lent is the fact that I have devised ways to “beat the system”. Instead of drinking my morning coffee with creamers and a couple packets of artificial sweetener, I have been drinking hot tea… with honey (it’s all-natural, right?). After lunch today I hit an all time low-legalistic-keeping-the-letter-of–the-law moment. I made myself an icy, creamy, sweet drink using Steve’s all nutural and healthy protein powder, peanut butter, and ice. It was awesome, it was chocolaty, it was …convicting. It’s not about the food, it’s about denial, identifying with Jesus’ sacrifice in some small tangible way. I know lent is not a “heaven or hell” issue, technically it’s not even Biblical, and is completely self-imposed. But it does make me wonder about the other areas of life that are “heaven and hell” serious. What mind games am I playing to dance around Truth to have my way and wants and still be able to check all the correct boxes?

I recently acquired a book written to the conservative holiness movement over 50 years ago by Leslie Wilcox called Beyond the Gate. I haven’t gotten very far yet, but I read something very interesting this morning:

“As nearly as we are able to analyze our present condition and the trends that are apparent in the holiness movement, it seems that one of our greatest dangers is that of maintaining the doctrinal form of holiness while the power of a holy life is actually absent. To any careful observer of the times it must be apparent that there is much preaching and much professing, but, by comparison, little power. There seems to be a wide gap between what we know and what we live. It is easy to make a glib profession of two works of grace, while as far as anyone can discern, the whole life is bound up with worldly interests and material values… We wish to raise a warning voice against a trend – a trend that could eventually mean the undermining of the doctrine we love and proclaim.”

Stained Glass Masquerade
By Mark Hall & Nicole Nordeman

Is there anyone that fails

Is there anyone that falls

Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small

Cause when I take a look around

Everybody seems so strong

I know they'll soon discover

That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay

If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too

So with a painted grin, I play the part again

So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people

Under shiny plastic steeples

With walls around our weakness

And smiles to hide our pain

But if the invitation's open

To every heart that has been broken

Maybe then we close the curtain

On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who's been there

Are there any hands to raise

Am I the only one who's tradedIn the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing

And we know every line by heart

Only when no one is watching

Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free

If I dared to let you see

The truth behind the person

That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open

Or would you walk away

Would the love of Jesus

Be enough to make you stay

Are we happy plastic people

Under shiny plastic steeples

With walls around our weakness

And smiles to hide our pain

But if the invitation's open

To every heart that has been broken

Maybe then we close the curtain

On our stained glass masquerade

Snowed In

2010-02-15T11:48:00.004-06:00

If the fact that the offices at GBS are closed today because of the weather wasn't enough to convince me that I am snowed in, two things have happened would have.

1. I just attempted to make snickerdoodle cookies using canola oil instead of butter -which I am out of. They are truly awful, even the powdered sugar I sprinkled on top as a last-ditch effort to save them didn't help. What's even worse was that I ate three of the little "hockey pucks" just because they are sitting there. I feel sick.

2. My violin came out of the closet. It hasn't been touched for years. The dogs tucked their tails and ran to the basement when I played it so I obviously am seriously out of practice. Steve is skiing with Kevin Moser and company otherwise I would not have had the nerve to play it at all.

I love the snow. It makes things seem timeless. We live in a neighborhood with large older homes and when it snows it feels like it could be 1895 or 2010.

2010-01-15T20:54:00.000-06:00

OK. I am supposed to be "cleaning my house from top to bottom" right now. Instead I am eating brownie mix mixed with diet cherry 7-up and zero calorie spray butter - nuked in the microwave... it's good. I promise! Steve is gone to Perfect North to ski and I am home alone with the dogs, eating strange food and trying to summon the will power to do that which I dread (clean). So I am going to distract myself and delay by writing a quick post about something really strange (in a good way) that happened. If you haven't read my previous post you might need to for this one to make sense.

I had to go to Kroger to buy hydrogen peroxide because our chocolate lab (Dagoba) ate mouse poison. He didn't just eat the little aqua blue pellets, he licked the tray clean. Steve and I were both gone and came home to a disaster. They (chocolate lab and yellow lab) had managed to get into the trash underneath the kitchen sink. While they were having a party, Dagoba decided to experiment with other substances (the mouse poison) also under the kitchen sink. We didn't know what to do. We called Daron Jones (a vet friend in Michigan) and he gave us advice. The bottom line was that the dog had to puke up everything in his system which required the fast trip to Kroger to buy Hydrogen Peroxide to induce ... gross, I know.
At that point (when you think your beloved pet is dying), you really aren't too terribly concerned about your appearance. I was wearing this huge GBS sweat shirt, long baggy jean skirt, and clunky athletic shoes. I ran into the store like a mad woman and asked the first employee I saw where the hydrogen peroxide was and then dashed to the cash register. The girl who rang me up looked at me and said, "You live in Mt. Auburn?" I thought, Oh she recognizes GBS on my shirt and must live in the neighborhood. I told her I did. Then she smiled really big and said, "You are the one who baked my boyfriend some cookies!"

If you read my last post it ended with a decision to bake the next door neighbor(s) cookies and wish them a Merry Christmas. Well, I did it. I marched over there late one night (much to my husband's displeasure) with warm chocolate chip cookies on a Christmas plate complete with matching napkins. When I got on the front porch I could tell there was a full house and a loud discussion was going on about the types of drugs they didn't use (encouraging). I knocked on the door and someone yelled, Who is it? I said in my nicest, friendliest voice, "It's Mandy, your next door neighbor." The door opened a crack and judging by the defensive look on his face I think he thought I was going to yell at them about their music or something. I squeaked, "Hi! I'm your next door neighbor and I have not had a chance to meet you yet so I wanted to bring over some cookies and wish you a Merry Christmas." The door went wide open and sitting around the room were a bunch of guys and a few girls... and they were all smiling (very encouraging). They all said "Thanks!" I said "Merry Christmas" and went home. End of story, I thought. Now I am not sure what to do. I do want to be a good witness to them. I can't believe I ran into someone who was at the house, who works at Kroger. I know it's a small world, but is that really just a coincidence?

I have really been challenged this week during the revival at GBS - what a good revival. It is a lot to process. Recently, even before Revival, I have been thinking a lot about my relationship with God. I have come to the conclusion that the past several years I have been lost in a maze, trying to figure out what I believe and where I fit. In this time of "wrestling" with my thoughts and questions, I unintentionally have lost sight of very reason why it all matters - my relationship with Jesus. He says, "Come unto me all ye who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light." I am ready for that. I want to just come to Jesus, to find that rest, to take His yoke and burden. I want to be a real Christian, not just a "rule-keeper". Do you know what I mean? I have a feeling that to come to Jesus is a perfectly balanced place to be.

As for Dagoba, the mouse-poison-eating dog, he is fine. I, on the other hand, am feeling pretty sick, I guess the brownie mix concoction wasn't all that it was cracked up to be. And now, it is time to clean the house. No more excuses.

Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men

2009-11-29T14:09:00.000-06:00

We have new neighbors next door - next door as in the house that is so close to ours I could open my kitchen window and sweep their faded, filthy red vinyl siding with a broom, well almost. People constantly come and go and we have not seen the person who is actually renting the house for over a month now. It's an interesting place to say the least. Mostly younger guys, typical "hood" type clothes and attitudes, girls, loud rap music, parties until 3 in the morning and two pit bulls that show up about as sporadically as the nice cars with out-of-state license plates. To be honest Steve and I are just waiting for the bullets to fly. These guys make the last tenant seem like a hybrid of Emily Post and Michelle Obama. (You can read about her in a previous post)

Yesterday I decided to decorate my porch for Christmas. Have you ever decorated for Christmas with hip-hop gangster rap rattling the walls of the house next to you... so loud you can clearly understand the lyrics? As if the shock of the volume wasn't enough, the words almost did me in. My personal favorite was "**** **** **** ****" mixed with a few personal pronouns and a reference to a cheating girl friend. "'Tis the season to be jolly"...not. So there I was feeling like Miss Suzie-White-Girl out hanging my garlands and red bows and white lights and wreaths while people came and went next door and the beat of the music blared on. You know, I hate to admit it, but as I wrapped my fake greenery and shiny red ribbon around everything that wasn’t moving, I wondered if there was even hope for people like that. What chance can someone who lives so morally debased possibly have? Is it even possible?

Sometime during the porch decorating episode I walked in the front door to get something I needed. From my little stereo in the kitchen that faces the dirty hovel next door came this:

I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head:
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men."

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead, nor doth he sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men."

You know that feeling where a wave of emotion hits you and your breath gets caught in your throat? I was wrong. There is a chance, a very good chance for people who live like the group next door. It’s got me thinking. Will I take them a gospel tract and share the Roman road? Probably not. Will they keep coming and going and doing whatever it is they do over there. Probably. Maybe I will take them chocolate chip cookies and wish them a Merry Christmas.

"Christ has no body now on earth but yours, no hands but yours, no feet but yours, Yours are the eyes through which to look out Christ's compassion to the world Yours are the feet with which he is to go about doing good; Yours are the hands with which he is to bless men now." — Teresa of Ávila

Vacation and House Pictures

2009-07-13T22:16:00.000-05:00

House Front - Before

House - Before

House in Progress

Notice the slightly yellow/tan front door? It took three different types of paint/primer and no joke, at least eight coats to get the brown stain to stop seeping through. It still is not 100% white yet, but I will succeed. I will conquer the door. It will be white!

House - In Progress

The view from the back of our house... just kidding!

Bradley Falls (Somewhere in the NC/TN mountains) If you decide to hike there you will pass about 10 signs warning you that people have died falling off of rock formations and cliffs (very comforting). You also have to cross a creekish river by climbing across bolders or going through the water... I opted for the water. Steve climbed the rocks (and soaked his shoes). It's beautiful. If I were better at posting pictures on this blog I would add more, but pictures never seem do nature justice, especially if your camera happens to be a Canon PowerShot with 4.0 mega pixels. We stopped there on our way home from South Carolina.

The Bucklands on Vacation (Hilton Head, SC)

Have I ever mentioned that I really like my in-laws? They are wonderful and I am thankful that I have in-laws that I am thankful for. It was a really, really nice time.

A side note: I was in the ocean and a dolphin came within three feet of my little float. I know people are supposed to be all excited about things like that, but to be honest it freaked me out. Knowing my luck the thing could have had rabies or some other ailment that turns typically docile, fun loving creatures into aggressive shark-like predators. It was funny though, the dolphin kept swimming by and splashing people in the water so it's safe to say that I was worried for nothing and I should have reached out and touched it just so I could say that I had touched a "wild dolphin in the ocean"... instead of admitting that I got out of there I quick as I could because I was terrified. O well...

254 McGregor

2009-03-30T21:04:00.000-05:00

We bought a house, a cottage house! It needs a lot of work, but it has great "bones" and loads of charm. It's funny how life works out. This house was for sale a little over a year ago and I wanted it then. The timing wasn't right for us and it sold. To make a long story short when the timing was right, it became available and we bought it.

This is a side shot of the house. I particularly love the garage door and rotten overhang. Notice if you would even as the house went "to pot" (whatever that means), the previous owner still managed to keep their dish for cable tv.

This is a shot of our beautiful back yard. I do have to say, it is very, very private!

When I look at this picture, I groan on the inside thinking of all the hours that I am going to be spending scraping all the peeling paint. I do like the transom around the front door.

This is just a shot of the side porch. On the other side of those horrid storm doors are french doors that open into the living room. Today I discovered that underneath several inches of decaying leaves the porch extends past the roof into a little patio area with a small walk way that leads to steps up into the back yard. Not that anyone in their right mind would want to be in the back yard right now...

Maybe I will post some pictures of the inside soon. Tonight I bought a little gas stove off of craigslist for the kitchen. I asked Jodi Marshall to go with me since our husbands were playing basketball. We weren't sure what we were in for, but everything turned out great and we even fit into the back of my Honda Accord. Did I mention that it is a very small stove? When you have a little cottage kitchen, you gotta have a little cottage stove, right? Right.

I'm Not Even Sure How to Title This....

2009-01-26T22:09:00.000-06:00

Okay. I have to post this. It is the most bizare thing that has ever happened to me. This evening, I was in my kitchen making flower arrangements for the Administration Building and my dogs started doing their thing they do when someone is near the house that shouldn't be. Steve was playing basket ball, I was here alone so I thought maybe I should check it out. I walked into the living room only to see to my horror that my front door was opening and I didn't know who was on the other side. Well, my dogs were still barking viciously so that detered whoever was on the other side from walking all the way in. Then I heard a woman's voice begging someone to put the gun down and then I realized, "Oh my goodness, there is a woman on my front porch, trying to get in my house, and she is about to get shot." What do you do? I asked her who she was. She was my next door neighbor. When I say next door neighbor, don't get the idea that there are large, spacious yards separating our houses... there is one very narrow sidewalk between them and us. I let her in. Long story short. She and her boyfriend split about a month ago. Tonight she and a friend were in the house. They ex-boyfriend broke in, cocked a gun and pointed it at her head. He told her to sit in a chair. Then he turned to her friend and made him put his hands up. While he was distracted, she ran out of her house to my house. Talk about surreal. Have you ever had an angry gunman a side walk away and had the person he wants to shoot in your house??? I prayed, she prayed. After a while, I called Austin Watters, a security guard at GBS, and asked him to walk by the house and see if he saw anyone still there. The ex-boyfriend left. We don't know when he left or where he went, but we were thankful to be safe. Her sister came and picked her up and I went back to making flower arrangements like nothing ever happened. It really turned out to be nothing, but after it was all over, I realized something very...cool. In those few moments when I didn't know if he was going to come over and start shooting, I was calm. On the inside there was a peaceful, restful calm. It was beyond human. I don't want to make something of something that wasn't really anything, but in all honesty, that is probably the closest I have come to facing the possibility of death. Do you know how incredible it is to feel peace and calm at that moment?

Well, one thing did die tonight and that was my diet. Ever since that happened I have been eating chocolate like there is no tomorrow. It's kind of sad because this morning I actually got up at 5:45 to exercise. All that, only to blow it at mid-night eating chocolate. Oh well, in the words of Anne, "Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it." Too bad there will always be chocolate. Wouldn't it be nice to be one of those people who don't like chocolate and enjoy eating vegetables?

Time

2009-01-05T18:04:00.001-06:00

Do you ever feel like time is going by too fast? ..And feel sad, a little bit scared, and very helpless about it? Today was registration for second semester at GBS. (By the way, we moved to Cincinnati last January to work for GBS) Steve and I started "hanging out" second semster... ten years ago. Is that really possible? Has it been that long since I sat in Sarah Wolf Fry's bedroom plotting social activities that would get David and Steve where we could be with them? Who would have thought that the Personal Witnessing Team at GBS had such marvelous rewards? (Honestly, I didn't join for that reason...although it probably helped keep me motivated)

Have I really been married two and a half years? Will I really be 30 in June? Do I really have a monsterous pile of greenery and Christmas decorations that need to be organzied and stored away for next year? Yes, to all the above.

"However many years a man may live, let him enjoy them all. But let him remember the days of darkness, for they will be many. Everything to come is meaningless. Be happy, young man, while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth...Remember your Creator in the days of your youth...Remember him - befor the silver cord is severed, or the golden bowl is broken; before the pitcher is shattered at the spring, or the wheel is broken at the well, and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it." Ecclesiastes

The Trashcan Bandit

2007-12-09T20:40:00.000-06:00

We recently sold our house and moved back into the church parsonage. In Adrian, Main street runs through the center of the town, so the town is divided East and West. West is the side of town where Realtors start their ads off with "Location, location, location..." We live of the Eastside. A couple of weeks ago, I was working in my back yard. I looked up and there was a tiny little puppy in the neighbor's yard, she doesn't have a dog. When I called to it and it darted across the street and was almost hit by a car. I marched over to where the dog lived "let them know their little puppy was loose and was almost hit by a car". There was another puppy loose. I knocked on the door, of course no one was home. So I put them in their pathetic little pen in the back yard. I started to walk away when I realized they had no water, what do you do? I went home and got them some water. By now all the neighbors are watching and offering comments and observations. When I came back puppy #1 was loose again and down at the other end of the street. I didn't want her to get hit and I didn't want to be unneighborly and call the police, so I put a note in their mailbox and took the puppy to my house until they came home. At 10 PM, Steve decided to walk down and talk to them. They said they had no idea she was gone. She never leaves the yard...blah, blah (did I mention is was freezing cold outside). She was such a sweet puppy, I hated to see her go, so I said goodbye and she went home. The next morning she was at our back door. I took her home and warned them about the busy street, etc. A little bit later I looked out the window,she was on my front porch...I took her home again and warned them about the busy street again. I was home less than 5 minutes and running across the yard toward me was the little puppy, I decided that they knew where their dog was they could come get her when they wanted her back. She spent the night. The next morning they still hadn't showed up, so I went over and talked to the guy's father. A little bit later, he showed up with his girlfriend and wanted us to give him $75 for both puppies. What you supposed to do? Once again, we wanted to be good neighbors, we live in the parsonage, etc. We found good homes for the dogs and were out the money. FAST FORWARD ABOUT 2 WEEKS...Steve and I went to Spring Arbor University's Christmas Program. When we came home there were two police cars on the street by our house. Our neighbor (he is a normal nice guy) came around the corner of his house and we asked what was going on. He said, "They cleaned me out." He drives truck for a living and while he was gone, someone broke in and took computers, stereo, guns, money, etc. They ransacked the place. However, you do have to give them credit, there were things on the ledge of the window they broke to get in and they left them in a neat little stacked pile. While the police were there, one of the neighbors showed up and said, "Do you want your stuff back, I know where it is." Before I get to that part of the story, I have to tell you that Steve and I both had noticed unusual tracks running from our back yard across our front yard and to the road. (We have snow) Steve asked me, "Did you do something with our trash can? I said "No. But maybe you should check to make sure it is still there." He went out back and it was there. I said, "Well maybe someone took our grill it has wheels just about the same distance apart." He went and checked, the grill was still there. He came back in and said, "Huh, that's odd, the neighbor must have used our trash can because the tracks go to his back door. I wonder why he didn't ask to use it?" We had one of those, "OK, that's weird" moments, forgot about it and went on with our business. BACK TO THE CRIME SCENE... The neighbor that got robbed was at the front door with the police officers while the other neighbor told them where the stolen stuff was. Our neighbor wasn't allow to go to the site. A little bit later the police came back and sure enough...his stuff was there. A little bit later, I decided to go get some hot chocolate. I saw the police and the neighbor walking down the street, so I decided to take my time backing out of the the drive. To make a very long story short, the people from whom we bought two mutt puppies for $75, robbed our neighbor blind and used our trash can to haul it away. But the most funny thing about the whole story is that they put our trash can back when they were finished.

Blogs and Dogs

2007-10-28T13:01:00.000-05:00

Steve and I have decided to take the plunge and enter the mysterious world of blogging. We are dog-sitting this weekend for a couple we know that rescue brittany spaniels. At the present time, they have six, yes 6, inside dogs. We brought along our two lab-mixes. So there are 8 dogs in about a 700 sq. ft. area. I have spent a large part of my weekend in the corner with my back turned to the complete chaos happening behind me, browsing people from college's blogs while poor Steve who is desperately trying to get his reading done for his online class work is left to fend for himself against the wild beasts. He just finally gave up and went to take the traditional Sunday afternoon nap - locking the dogs out of the bedroom. Dennis (truly - the menace) immediately started pawing and clawing at the door (he's a dog, I don't think I mentioned that, Dennis that is, not Steve). Judging by the quality and deep profundity of this, my first post, I should join Steve for a nap.